OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize