I'd wear matching sweaters with you
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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