I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
