they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
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We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
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Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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