My hair reeks of homosexuality.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize