Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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