Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
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