But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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