My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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