yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Randomize
