Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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