Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
You were trust falling into bushes
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