he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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