Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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