You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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