I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize