Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
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Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
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i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
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