I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
