good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
