your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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