i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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