so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
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