Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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