"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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