I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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