Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I could fuck to npr.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
