john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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