help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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