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There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize