ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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