It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
