hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Randomize