he shaved USA in his pubs
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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