worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
