Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize