If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
