Where did you get a picture of my penis
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was CRYING into my vagina
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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