if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
You are a genius and a whore.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
