found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
