Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize