Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize