You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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