How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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