dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
