? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
