My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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