the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
