Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize