Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
third nipple confirmed
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
