Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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