Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
